Self-doubt?

Hey readers, do you guys have like deep thoughts about yourselves, the world and everything around you? Well, I do~ some nights... Before I go to bed... I have some thinking about what I want to do with my life, what I want in my life (that i know I couldn't have) and what's my plan? And I start thinking about how lucky my friends are, that they got to go overseas to study/ work, to experience what's out there whereas me, i'm always here... where I've been all my life~ doing nothing useful.. this just make me feel so helpless and hopeless.. 

I wanted to have the chance to go out and experience what they've experience out there... Get some adventure and challenge in my life! But the thing is... I know that I'm not an independent person.. I tend to depend on people around me~ and this somehow makes me sad too... Knowing that this could be the thing that's stopping me and holding me back! 

What people said are true, that you'll feel lost once you've graduated because you are really on your own now. You can't have people guiding your path for you anymore. You gotta build them yourself~ 

This is the first time that I really write down what I thought about. I don't really do this because I know no matter if I wrote about this or not it won't help me in anyway but just to give myself some sort of relief for expressing my feelings and thoughts~ 

Okay~ enough with this self pity.. Good night~ 

One selfie for this piece~